Stark Raving Mad
by K'lara7
Summary: My answer to TF challenge SC63, two or more characters pitched against each other in pursuit of the same goal.


**Disclaimer**: Farscape and its characters don't belong to me. I've obviously borrowed them. In fact, I borrowed most of this. If you recognize it from something else, it's not mine. This is pretty rushed, not beta tested.

**Rating**: PG

**Setting and Spoilers**: Not really sure myself. Middle of Season 4.

**Word Count**: 1982

It was shopping day on Moya. Somehow John got elected to go. He hated shopping. It always turned out bad. Sending Stark with him was definitely a bad idea.

The human supposed it could be worse. They could have sent Chiana with him. She'd probably snurch the wrong thing and send him back into a mind frelling game again. This time it might cause serious brain damage.

So far John had managed to keep Stark out of trouble. Every time he saw something he wanted, John reminded him of why they came.

It was when they got to the last stall that Stark really went nuts. The vendor had a box. It was small, green and glittered weirdly. Stark said he had to have it. It spoke to him.

John tried to talk him out of it. The salesman guaranteed that it would take all of the Stakeera's pain away, leaving only the happy memories.

"Stark, that's not possible. Pain is a part of life. It helps make us who we are."

"Crichton, just think what if you only had the happy memories? No more Scorpy. No more missing Earth, no skreeth."

"My friends would still be dead; I'd just have no memory of them being alive. No thanks. No one is messing with my mind again. I am not losing that."

The salesman interrupted. "It won't take your memories away. It only helps with the coping. If you open the box, it will let the evil out."

"Exactly, evil shouldn't be let out. We don't open Pandora's Box. We don't ring the bell and awaken the witch. We leave sleeping dogs lie. Stark you are not buying that."

"Get away Crichton. The box is mine. Mine, I say!" Stark puffed up and got in the human's face.

"Fine, buy it then, whatever. Keep it in your quarters, and the frell away from me. Keep it away from the others, go." He shook his head and headed back toward the pod.

Stark caught up with him a few microts later. "You see Crichton? There's nothing to be worried about. It's only my Precious!"

John jerked around. "What did you call it?"

"It's only a box. Nothing really special about it."

"No that's not what you said. You called it your Precious."

''That's ridiculous. There is nothing Precious about it."

"Since that's settled, why don't you leave it here? Why did you buy it?"

"I like it. It calls to me. Stark...-Stark-… Can't you hear it?"

With a raise of his eyebrows, John responded, "No I can't. That can't be good. You should take it back. Go get your money back."

"You're just jealous because it talks to me, not you."

"Whatever Stark. Let's just get back to Moya."

The whole way back to the Leviathan Stark whispered to the box while petting it. John tried to tune him out and was very happy to see the crew of Moya in the bay.

D'Argo came over to help unload, while Chiana came over to see what Stark was holding.

"What is that?" she asked.

"Don't mind him; he's finally gone Stark raving mad."

"I thought he was always Stark and mad?" D'Argo asked.

"Yeah," John rubbed his forehead. "He is. Dee, would you mind putting the groceries away? I'm not feeling too well."

"Sure John. Aeryn's in command, Rygel's in the Center Chamber. We'll call you if we need you."

"Thanks." His attention was caught by Stark and Chiana fighting over the box. "Children, knock it off. It's not worth fighting over."

"Crichton, make him share," Chiana whined.

"Pip, it's his. He doesn't have to share. Stark, put that thing in your cell and help D'Argo unload."

John woke up to a great deal of shouting just outside his quarters. The noise did nothing to improve the hangover headache from a binge that never happened. The Leviathan's walls seemed to be pulsating in time to the argument outside. The human rolled himself out of bed and stumbled over to the refresher to get dressed.

When he came out a few minutes later the fight had gotten into full swing. He stumbled over to the door to find out why everyone was shouting. The sight that greeted him left him speechless. Stark was cornered in the hallway by the door. He was clutching that frelling box to his chest and shivering like a leaf in the wind. Sikozu stood on the wall above him. Moving in a sneak attack, she tried to steal the box out of his hands.

Noranti stood off to side waving her broom around like the Wicked Witch of the West. She kept trying to bat the box out of the Banik's hands. Unfortunately, her aim was as horrible as her cooking. Chiana was jumping about between Noranti and Stark like a rotating bobble head.

D'Argo and Rygel were shouting at each other. The jist of the conversation was that Rygel felt the box was a waste of money and D'Argo thought it would make a great weapon.

Only Aeryn seemed to be holding it together. She was impatiently pacing behind all the action, nervously tapping her sidearm with her fingers. "Oh, just give it to me already!" she shouted, moving toward him.

Stark shrank even further into the wall. "No. It's mine, mine. You can't have it, it's mine."

Sikozu took the opportunity to try to take it away from him. Stark swatted at her like she was a pesky fly in his way. "I can help you. You don't understand what it is you have. That box is very important. It can do so many things."

John couldn't believe what he was seeing. His friends were fighting over a box. Couldn't they see there was nothing special about it? He waved his hand in front of the door control opening his cell. The whole group looked toward him as he stepped forward. "What is going on here? I was trying to sleep."

"Crichton," Chiana whispered. "He won't share. I just want to look at it."

"Chi, we've been over this before, it's Starks."

"He can't be allowed to keep it!" Sikozu shouted from her perch.

"I agree," Aeryn said as she pulled her gun. "Give it to me, NOW!"

"Aeryn, what do you think you are doing?" John shouted. He couldn't believe she was trying to take the box too.

"Crichton, stay out of my way. The box is mine!"

"No. It's Stark's." He stepped forward to try and take the pulse pistol away from her and tripped on a DRD. His forward movement pushed him into Stark knocking the box out of his hand. Before anyone realized the box was free, another DRD scooped it up and disappeared into one of Moya's access shafts.

Rygel stepped off his throne sled and scooted in after it. Barely a few microts passed before Rygel popped back out. "The DRD just disappeared."

"Where did it go?" Sikozu asked.

"I don't know. You're the Leviathan expert, where does that shaft lead?" Rygel responded.

"That leads to Pilot's Den."

"Pilot? What's going on with the DRDs?"

"There's nothing going on with the DRDs. They are all functioning normally, Commander."

"This is normal? Why did they trip me?"

"Moya feels that things are getting out of control and it scares her. She has decided to take matters into her own hands."

"So where is she taking my Precious?" Stark asked.

John looked at him sideways. "Stark, we've been over this, there is nothing precious about the box."

"But I wants it. It calls to me."

D'Argo smacked him upside the head. "It doesn't say anything. It is a weapon, perhaps a powerful weapon, one we could use to our advantage."

Crichton rolled his eyes. "Not you too D. Really it's just a box. Boxes are bad. You open one and you never know what might happen."

"What are you talking about Crichton?" Aeryn asked.

John shook his head and started off toward Pilot's den. The more he heard about this box, the more he wanted to destroy it. Obviously he wasn't going to make it to the Tarken treasure planet, or anywhere off Moya, so where on Moya could he destroy it?

"Pandora's Box? You know, open the box and let out all the evil?" Seeing her blank look he waved his hand in the air and shouted, "Never mind."

He realized suddenly that he wasn't alone; everyone had decided to follow him. Rolling his eyes, he jumped up in to the ventilation shafts and disappeared. Over the cycles, Crichton had familiarized himself with the shafts. He never realized he'd have to use that knowledge against his shipmates. Within microts he was over Pilot's Den and dropping down onto the breezeway. The DRD came rolling past him, just in time for the human to grab it.

The thing pulsed at him. It seemed to have a living breathing heart. Suddenly Stark's comments made sense to him. It did call to him. It promised ultimate power, ultimate control. Like wormhole weapons this thing promised to annihilate his enemies. No more Scorpious, no more Grayza.

John was tempted to use it. He wanted to use it. With his enemies gone, his friends would be safe. He wouldn't have to run anymore. He was so tired of running.

Pilot's voice snapped him out of it. "Crichton, you must give it to me. Moya and I will protect it. We won't misuse it."

"No Pilot. That's what it wants. It likes us fighting over it. No we need to destroy it. And I will need your help. Yours and Moya's. I think the Starburst Chamber is the only place this can be destroyed. Will you help me?"

Pilot seemed to be in conflict. He was hesitating.

"Pilot, you and Moya are pacifists. You do not want to unleash a powerful weapon. If Noranti were in her own mind, she wouldn't want to either. We must destroy it. Trust me?"

"I do, Commander. More importantly, so does Moya. What do you want us to do?"

"We need to initiate the first stage of Starburst and incinerate it."

"The others will fight that."

"I know. We need a distraction, quickly. They must be almost here. I'm surprised Chi isn't. She knows Moya's shaft system better than I do."

"True, she must not be thinking clearly."

"I know! Tell them the trill bats got me; that my body and the box are down there. I don't need much time Pilot, maybe 400 microts."

"I'll do my best Commander."

"I know you will, Pilot."

Suddenly Pilot screamed, "Commander! Look out!" But he was a moment too late. The same DRD who had stolen the box, shoved him off the ledge. John clung to the box, trying desperately not to lose his grasp while trying to think of a way to stop his fall...

…And jerked awake. "Oh, thank God, it was just a dream." He lay on his bed stunned. He was trying desperately to get his bearing.

"Good morning, John." The woman breezed past his bed to his bookshelf.

He squinted. "Zhaan? But your—"

"Dead?" she asked and waited for his nod. "Well, yes. I came from the other side for this." She turned away from him and picked the box up from the shelf.

John hadn't realized it was there. If it was a dream, then how did it get there? "Zhaan, that thing is dangerous. It seems to have a life of its own."

"Yes, John, that's why I sent it to Stark. It's lonely on the other side. We despair. We need hope. It's time for you to come with us."

He shook his head, as if to clear the fog. "I can't come with you Zhaan, your dead."

"Don't fight it John. It's not so bad." She turned toward him, her eyes bright red, and opened the box-.


End file.
